My Underarms

Are extremely sensitive. No joke. This is why I typically wear long sleeves to work. I either have to get in touch with my inner hippie every once in awhile (which I hate doing) or trade hair for what looks like a Norman Bates canvas. I hate it. So this morning when I woke up and 100 times did not want to wear a skirt to work (I choose my outfits the night before so as to buy some extra snooze time in the amz) I picked an outfit out of my butt (ok, closet) in about 2 seconds. Everything was short sleeve. (Which is unusual for me since I fancy the fall and winter it is normal for me to buy for those seasons). On my way out the door I realized it looked like I'd been living in a tree for a minute. So I went into the bathroom, picked my razor out of the shower and was soon dreading the task at (in) hand.

I don't normally converse with inanimate objects (lies) but this was a special occasion. I looked me razor straight in the eye and made this deal. "You fulfil your destiny and give me a clean shave, or I throw you in the rubbish bin and let the online community know how small your weiner is".

I thought for sure I was doomed.

But it turns out, it was a very nice, clean shave. And I would like to tell you how pleased I am. It is a Bic. For the males. But I am very impressed with the work it has done. My underarms look class, and my smile is in tact.

In other news, I am house sitting for a friend in about a week. I am ridikuluslee excited about this opportunity. I love all of my roommates very much, but sometimes a girl's just gotta spread her wings and prepare to fly (Not the appendage I would have thought Mariah to choose) and this is my ability to take a test run. I'm going to bake and cook and watch the SATC series (what I can get thru) and sleep on her bed (appropriately nicknamed, "Heaven" on account of it's King size-ness and pillow topped-ness and delicious 2000 (was that the number?) thread count egyptian cotton sheets (na na na na na na na na). Basically a one bedroom apt in W Seattle. So exciting. And it's near the farmer's market, and cupcake lounges, and cutsie little shops. And it's a secure building, so I won't have to worry about jokers. ...Unless they also live in the building (I mean, even Dexter has an apartment...) but I'm hoping for the best. Maybe I'll meet a gentleman caller. To quote Steve Carell playing Barry Speck quoting John Lennon, "You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not".

Hah.